Sincerely Stefanie

Lately I have found myself so focused on the big events happening in my life that I have neglected the small, day to day things I should be doing to maintain my happiness and well being. In my defense, there has been a lot of HUGE things going on. Last weekend, my brother got married and I luckily got to be a part of that special day. It was super busy, but so much fun and everything went perfectly. That same week, John accepted a full time position in Cincinnati! So, while that is ridiculously exciting, it has also pushed us to find a place to live… And fast. Right now, apartment/condo/house searching is my part time job because until we find something, John is living in a hotel. We are both elated to be in the same city after almost a year and a half, but we are beyond ready to be settled into a place of our own. 

So, that’s what’s happening in May. June will bring Kendra and Alex’s wedding, which involves a trip to North Carolina. I’m so excited to get out of town and even more excited that John and I both get to be a part of their day. Once the end of June hits, maybe I’ll start focusing on my own wedding…. 

Today though, I got to thinking about self care. All of the stress in my life right now is good stress… But it’s stress, regardless. I don’t want to constantly feel like I’m checking things off a list or worrying about how the next big milestone will pan out. I need to be more focused on the here and now and practice healthier day to day habits so I can feel better while doing it. For now, I’m starting small and giving myself 3 goals to implement into my life:

• Drink more water. I’m the worst at this. The. Worst. For my entire life I have for some reason rejected the idea of staying hydrated and it’s done me no good whatsoever. So, for at least the next month I am cutting out soft drinks completely and only drinking water. I will also only allow myself to drink alcohol 3x a month (which I probably won’t even do). As for Starbucks… That’s not going anywhere. I’m not a masochist.
• Get up at the same time every day, even when I can sleep in. With working second shift, I sometimes feel like the reason I’m drained is because I’ve overslept. I need to get in more of a routine with my sleep cycle so that I’m starting the day off right every time.
• Try to find some form of exercise 5 days a week. Even if this means I take a few extra trips up the flight of stairs at work or lift weights while I’m watching television, I want to get more active. I think I become discouraged because I don’t move as fast or have as much stamina as a lot of my peers. Spare me the logical response to that…. I already know. SO, it’s time to get off my butt and move.

Unofficial goals include writing more and having more fun… But that’s a story for another day. I do believe that making small changes in day to day life can really help in dealing with the bigger stuff. Here’s hoping that’s really true!

XoXo,

Stefanie

Though ‘The Onion’ is hardly a credible source of news, this article took the words right out of my mouth. So instead of trying to find the words to describe how I (and the rest of the country) have felt all week, I decided to borrow the following…

Jesus, This Week:

WASHINGTON—Calling the last four days of American life just…I mean, talk about a goddamned punch in the gut, citizens across the nation confirmed today that, Jesus, this week.

This fucking week, sources added.

Christ.

“Seriously, can we wrap this up already?” Maryland resident James Alderman told reporters, echoing the thoughts of all 311 million Americans, who have just about reached their weekly goddamned quota for carnage, misery, confusion, heartbreak, and rage. “Because, you know, I’m pretty sure we’ve all had our hearts ripped out of our chests and stomped on enough times for one seven-day period, thank you very much.”

“Man oh man,” Alderman added, shaking his head. “Can you believe this? Can you honestly believe the kind of piece-of-shit week we’re having here?”

According to a new poll by the Pew Research Center, when reached for comment on this week, 93 percent of Americans responded “Okay, enough’s enough here, you have seriously got to be kidding me with this week,” with 84 percent saying “Is it Sunday yet? What? How in the hell are we only at Thursday? What the hell is going on?” and 100 percent of Americans responding “No, no, go ahead, just pile some more horrific shit on this hellish shitshow of a week. Have at it.”

Following what could only be described by witnesses as the goddamned week to end all soul-crushing weeks, sources all across the nation reported that, sorry, is all this shit really happening at once? Because if all this shit is really happening at once, multiple reports verified, then this might actually be, honest to God, one of the worst weeks of all time.

No joke, added anyone with a set of working eyes and ears. Of all time.

“Maybe next time we have a week, they can try not to pack it completely to the fucking brim with explosions, mutilations, death, manhunts, lies, weeping, and the utter uselessness of our political system,” said basically every person in America who isn’t comatose or a complete sociopath. “You know, maybe try to spread some of that total misery across the other 51 weeks in the year. Just a thought.”

“Gotta hand it to this week, though,” added the entire American populace, laughing and crying at the same time. “It’s a motherfucker.”

At press time, sources confirmed that, you know what? Forget this week. 2013 as a whole can pretty much go straight to hell where it belongs.

For. Real. I can’t even begin to imagine how Bostonians and Texans are feeling… Many prayers are going out to them in the aftermath of these horrific events. And as of 30 minutes ago, the last suspect in the Boston Marathon bombings has been captured alive, but injured. Kudos to the Boston police for gettin ‘er done. It’s a proud day to be an American. Now, please. Just let the hate stop.

xoxo,

Stefanie

Today I am itching to write, to finally update this thing, but my thoughts are so jumbled that I wouldn’t know where to begin. My life has been especially chaotic in the past months and though I wouldn’t change it, I think I need a break from thinking about it today. So instead, I’m shifting my thoughts to three things that make me calm and happy: Coffee, books and impromptu conversations with strangers.

Because I’ve had all of these things today, life is wonderful. I feel like society is pretty harsh nowadays, and it’s not very often that a person can have a scintillating chat with someone they’ve just met. I can’t even begin to count the number of times that I’ve smiled at a stranger or simply said hello and they’ve looked at me like I was a psychopath. An especially fun experience was being at the grocery store and having this exchange:

Me: Excuse me, can you help me reach the Coke Zero? I’m too short.

Man: *giving me the stink eye* No, I’m married.

Awk. Ward. At first, I used to think it was me. Do I come off as flirtatious? Possibly. Do I look like a criminal? My brother says it’s the tattoo. I just wanted Coke Zero!!!

Point of story, it’s intimidating to strike up a conversation with a stranger! By doing so, one is often assumed to have an agenda, be a creep or in the case above, be a ho fo sho.

Alas, it’s also something I love. And today I hit the jackpot with a lonely, new to town, fifty-something! Yep, I’m officially lame. Regardless, I had a blast talking with this lady. Whilst participating in my favorite activity, reading at Starbucks (told ya- lame), this kind woman decided to ask me about my book. Usually I get irritated as hell if someone interrupts me while I’m reading, but it was so refreshing to see a stranger reach out for conversation! We had a lovely chat about our careers, books and traveling and then that was it- off she went. Honestly, I wish there were more people like her, brave enough to do that. I likely won’t ever see her again, but I’d like to think that our conversation was a pleasant addition to both of our days.

It just strikes me as funny, why we don’t do this more often. If you’ll notice, adults make total asses out of themselves every day to try and make babies and children smile. Why do we stop that? It seems as though going out of our way to make people smile should extend into adulthood as well. Just my two cents…

On a different note, I know a lot of people that are often searching for book recommendations. Since sharing things that I love adds to my happiness (it’s selfish, really), I thought I’d post some every once in a while. Here’s the first batch!

Enjoy! And be nice! :)

XoXo,

Stefanie

Oh my, I think it’s safe to say that I spoke a little too soon in my last post. Life has not slowed down… In fact, it’s moving full speed ahead. It’s been a while, I know. In my defense, I’ve not had a working computer and well, I’ve been a little busy being ENGAGED and all!

A month later, this is somewhat “old” news, but I’m excited to finally have the chance to write about the best day of my life (so far). John finally took the plunge and popped the question! A lot of people have asked over the past month how he did it. Well, on December 23rd, we spent some time with my family and then John said he wanted to take me out on a date. We hardly ever get to go out on dates anymore (being 4 hours apart kind of puts a damper on that), so I was very excited. He asked me if there was any restaurant downtown that I’d been wanting to try, so after looking at the Christmas tree on Fountain Square, we walked over to Nada where we had yummy drinks and feasted on a delicious meal. I have to give major props to my man. During the meal, he pretty much made me feel like the most loved woman on Earth. I won’t go into potentially gag-worthy details, but let’s just say the man can be sweet. After dinner, we walked outside and John had a horse carriage waiting for us. It was decorated like Cinderella’s carriage and came complete with electric blankets and Christmas music… I loved it. From there, we went on an hour long ride through downtown Cincinnati and historic parts of Covington. About 45 minutes into the ride, he got down on one knee (in the carriage!), said something beautiful (that I can’t quite remember details of because I was crying so hard) and pulled out the most gorgeous ring I’ve ever seen. I haven’t stopped smiling since.   

So it’s happening, people! September 21, 2013 to be exact. And can I just say, this wedding planning thing is much more complicated than it looks. It’s fun, yes, but it’s also stressful. I do have the tendency to overthink everything, so that could be playing a part to my stress. I do need to step it up though. The wedding is less than 8 months away and all I’ve done is book a ceremony and reception site.

My current struggle is color schemes. I don’t care what anyone says, color schemes are a total bitch. There are too many choices and I’m indecisive as hell. I like everything! Every. Single. Thing. And every time I ask anyone for their opinion they tell me “This is your day, do what you want.” Well, that would be helpful advice if I knew what I want, but I have no clue except for wanting something with an autumn feel. And despite popular belief, sometimes Pinterest does more harm than good. Every time I’ve started to favor something, I log on and there’s a new fabulous idea that puts all of my previous ones to shame. So seriously friends, if anyone has suggestions, ideas, bursts of inspiration… Send them my way. I promise, despite it being “my day” and all, I really do want/need the help!   

Anyways, I’m excited to write more now that I have a functioning laptop. I promise I’ll try to avoid nonstop wedding talk, as I understand that color palette drama is not the most riveting material. However, since I don’t want to lose all of my friends, this may sometimes be my best place to vent.

I’m stressed to the max, but this is my fairytale. Luckily, I do have brilliant people in my life who are there to remind me of what’s really important. I get to spend the rest of my life with the all around best guy I’ve ever met. How cool is that? But like all love stories, a few spontaneous bouts of crazy are inevitable. So bear with me… 

XoXo,

Stefanie

Happy Autumn! The most wonderful time of the year (in my opinion) officially began yesterday and I could not be more excited. I already have a cabin weekend planned, some new Fall recipes added to my Pinterest board and have completed my first (of many, hopefully) Autumn walk in the park. Even though I have to work a few weekends in October, I plan to make the most out of the season and enjoy as many of my favorite things as I can. With the exception of work, life is slowing down a bit so hopefully I will be able to do just that. 

In the past month or two, I have been out of town every weekend. Columbus, Chicago and Pennsylvania to be exact. This weekend was my first weekend to really unwind and get some much needed rest and time to myself. There’s been a lot of excitement going on with those around me to take in over the past couple of months. Not only did my brother get engaged, but so did one of my closest friends. In addition, the wife of John’s best friend had their baby, another friend of mine had her baby boy (who I still need to meet!) and news of another pregnancy was shared. (I’m not sure if it’s public knowledge yet, so my lips are sealed). 

None of the news is even mine and I’m still overwhelmed! Next year will be an exciting year to say the least! As for me personally: I have made some fantastic new friends, traveled to new places, read several good books and I’ve gotten to spend a lot of quality time with the people I love most. I’ve also smiled… a lot.

So this may not be the most exciting post, but it’s my life right now. I’m working a lot and trying to focus on myself through baby steps: drinking more water, getting more sleep, walking and taking my vitamins. I want to be completely healthy this year so that I can enjoy the season to the fullest. While there are a few things on my mind, I’m still trying to sort through my thoughts before putting them into words. Maybe next time. Until then…

XoXo,

Stefanie

1. Before you status update, Tweet, Tumble or Instagram, pause and say to yourself, “is it entirely necessary that I share this morsel of thought with my entire social network?”and if the answer is not, “yes, I absolutely must,” then step away from the Internet.
   
2. Know which candidate you’re going to vote for in the upcoming presidential election, and know why.
   
3. Enough with the 14-day juice cleanses. If you want to lose a little weight quickly, eat less and exercise like crazy. If you want to lose a lot of weight slowly, do whatever Jennifer Hudson did.
   
4. If you really like the person you’re hooking up with and would like them to be your boyfriend/ girlfriend, find a way to tell them, and hope for the best. If you don’t and wouldn’t, stop.
   
5. Find a way to save approximately 300 dollars and spend it on a flight to see a friend or family member who lives far away.
   
6. Please stop liking the Kardashians, all of them. It’s not helping anyone, least of all the Kardashians.
   
7. Spend less than or equal to the money you earn each month.
   
8. Wear clothes that fit you, especially to work.
   
9. Call someone on the phone at least once a week, and speak to him or her for at least ten minutes.
   
10. Start preparing now to get over the fact that Facebook is probably going to change again in six months. You’re not going to deactivate your account. You don’t know how.
    
11. Wait 30 seconds before you look up a fact you can’t remember on your phone, and try to remember it using your brain. This is what the olden days were like.
    
12. Replace one terrible reality show you’re currently watching with one wonderful scripted show currently available on television.  Swap suggestion: Real Housewives of Anywhere for HBO’s Enlightened.
    
13. Try that food you think you don’t like but have never actually tried, unless it’s brussels sprouts. They really don’t need any more attention.
    
14. Cut one person out of your life who you truly do not like and add one person who you truly do. Note: not on Facebook, on Earth.
    
15. If you’re still blacking out regularly, you should stop.
    
16. Volunteer once over the next 90 days.  You’ll feel really good about it, and probably end up volunteering again over the next 275.
    
17.  Tell someone who you love that you love them on a more regular basis. To their face, not in a text.
    
18. Back up your entire online life onto an external hard drive, especially your photos.
    
19. Crap or get off the pot. This applies to whatever thing you’re not doing that you should just sack up and do already.
    
20. And in the eternal words of Tom Haverford, “TREAT YO SELF!”

When people warned me about the difficulties of a long distance relationship, I believed them and prepared myself for it. What I wasn’t prepared for was how exhausting it is to be in one! Now six months in, I feel as though my relationship is stronger than ever… but girlfriend needs a nap!

In the past 3-4 months I have been to New Orleans and Maine and I have traveled to Columbus  approximately every two weeks. Luckily, John’s family has been great about letting us stay with them during our stays in Columbus, but let’s face it- Driving is exhausting after a while and it’s hard to adjust to an unfamiliar bed or couch. For me, it takes at least one night to adjust to a new surrounding so by the time I get comfortable, it’s time to pack up and leave again. For a person that needs about 10 hours of sleep a night, this just doesn’t cut it.

On my solo weekends, I have spent every waking moment socializing with friends because a) I love them and b) I have found that keeping busy makes the whole “never getting to see your boyfriend” thing a lot easier. For a while, my plan was flawless. I have loved reuniting with John on our weekends and my amazing girlfriends have kept me sane in between. So much so, that I want to see them all the time! Now I’m running on empty. Today I woke up (after 9 ½ hours of sleep, mind you) and felt flooded with exhaustion. The constant running has finally caught up with me and I, as well as my bank account, am drained.

My two cups of coffee haven’t done the trick, so I can no longer ignore the fact that I need a break and some time to sleep and recharge. I think sometimes we get so caught up in trying to be productive, have fun or make others happy that we forget how important self-care is. I’ve learned that the hard way before and don’t wish for a repeat.   

So this week, it’s all about me. I have one social date that I plan to keep, but with the exception of going to work, I plan to spend the entire week in my pajamas reading and catching up on my DVR. Judge me, I dare you.

XoXo,

Stefanie

Here’s a belated shout out to good ole America. Yesterday was the 4th of July and instead of celebrating with friends and family, I was unfortunately stuck watching fireworks from my dining room window. What a perfect day to get a stomach bug…. It’s just as well though. Frankly, it’s been an *exhausting* week so maybe it was a good thing that I was forced to stay in and rest. 

John and I went to Maine last week for Ben and Maria’s wedding and it was so fantastic. Everything about the wedding was gorgeous and I was lucky enough to spend more time with John’s amazing (and large) family. I don’t know where or when my obsession with New England began (perhaps it sprung from old episodes of Gilmore Girls or reading numerous Jodi Picoult books set in small New England towns), but I have always wanted to live there (without having even visited!). But look… I fit right in!

It was just as beautiful as I had imagined. The small towns are so quaint and welcoming and everything about New England just screams “Stefanie! Pack your bags and move here!” Now if only I could get John on board…

While our stay IN Maine was wonderful, getting there and back was less than ideal. The following events occurred before we touched down in Portland, ME. 

• At our layover in Philadelphia, we see that our gate has been changed (right before we are supposed to board) to a gate completely across the airport. After sprinting through the airport and catching a shuttle to the gate, we are told that our gate hadn’t been changed, that it was back at the first gate and we missed our flight. 
• We catch a 9pm flight (original was at 4pm) and are told by the car rental company that as long as we are there by 11pm we can still get our car. No problem since our flight is due to land at 10:20, right? Wrong. THIS flight is 30 minutes late. 
• We sprint to the car rental area (once again, across the airport and across the street) and arrive JUST in time at approximately 10:58pm. Our rental care REEKS of marijuana. 
• I wait in the car while John gets our luggage and try to air out the car and avoid getting high. It would only be fitting that at this moment, a cop decides to stick his head in the window. Luckily, he has either lost his sense of smell or is just simply too tired to care, because he only instructs me to move the car. I avoid arrest. 
• John (who is sleepy and let’s be honest, grumpy) takes the wheel and we start our one hour trek to the hotel. Within minutes of getting on the highway a deer runs directly in front of our car, missing it by a probably a few feet. The meltdown that had been building up inside of me for hours is triggered.

Our travels home were less eventful until… We get back to my car and I realize I virtually have no brakes. I don’t think I took a single breath from Columbus to Kentucky. 

Now that I’m home safe and had a second to relax, I can’t help but laugh at all of the little bumps that we encountered. Really, I just wish we could’ve stayed longer. Being in such a perfect place surrounded by such perfect company really does make coming back to the “real world” difficult. 

XoXo,

Stefanie

This weekend I learned that sometimes it’s best to bite your tongue in moments of anger rather than say things you’ll regret… Even if you REALLY want to say them. I learned that the best remedy for a bad day is being held in the arms of the one you love subsequently following a stiff drink. I was taken aback by the strength of family and shown that blood doesn’t always define family. This weekend I took in the beautiful views of Downtown Columbus at sunset, all while experiencing a new appreciation for the city and a distaste for bubble tea. I learned that everything has its own timing & way of working out so maybe I need to relax and enjoy myself a little more. I disconnected from my phone which allowed me to reconnect with myself. In doing so, I realized that hey, I’m a pretty decent chick. 

It. Was. Lovely

XoXo,

Stefanie

I’ve been in a seemingly inexplicable funk this week. Even when I’ve been having a great time, I’ve felt dazed and down in the dumps. Thank God my mother knows me better than I know myself and was able to offer an explanation… She pointed out to me that Tuesday was my Grandpa’s birthday.

Even though he passed away 12 years ago, it never fails that every year around his birthday and the anniversary of his death I am not myself. I don’t particularly notice the date until after the fact, but I begin having intense dreams about him and I just become very sad. Despite what a lot of people think or believe, I don’t see it as coincidence. 

I didn’t think it would be possible to miss someone as much as I miss him. People use the term “Daddy’s Girl”… Is there such a thing as a “Grandpa’s Girl?” If so, I was it. He is the center of my childhood memories and one of the biggest influences on my life. I can’t even begin to explain the bond we had. Strangely enough I didn’t mourn for him much when it happened, perhaps because that night and the weeks following were such a shock. I was a young teenager who had just lost her grandma only months before and I think I was still trying to process it all. I was numb. Now here I am, a 26 year old woman who often cries herself to sleep thinking about it. It’s interesting how grief works. 

But no, I don’t feel as though my funk is a coincidence. I think that around these important dates, my subconscious is forcing me to feel things I often hold in and remember things that are often too difficult to think about. That’s not such a bad thing… It’s refreshing to reflect on my memories with him.

To anyone that still has grandparents, I envy you and hope you know how lucky you are. I lost all of mine way too early and it’s one of the only regrets I have. Don’t take them for granted.  

XoXo,

Stefanie